In October of 2010 my life began to be shaken by God. I had no idea how much it would be shaken, over the next several months.
I had been introduced by a loved one to the fact that there is a cabal of elite individuals ‘running the show’ in global politics, media and business. He told me several things he knew about and told me to research it myself and that I’d be shocked at what I found – and I was. I discovered there was a lot of material out there out on what some people describe as ‘the fringe’ – information that the majority of people would think you were crazy if you spoke to them about.
Conspiracy theories, the Illuminati, the New World Order agenda, and much more. I found documentaries about these topics and watched them repeatedly, realizing there was occult symbolism everywhere in our world and it was no accident. Company logos, music videos and movies, even the secular songs themselves are either displaying visually, or preaching (or both) anti-Christ doctrines and leading people to Satan and his ‘do as thou wilt‘ ideology.
Even knowing this, I still watched the movies, the music videos and listened to the music because I liked the catchy tunes – and surely they wouldn’t affect me, right? I was too smart to be brainwashed by the Illuminati/Lucifarian/Occult messages, subliminal or otherwise, right? Their Satanic chants couldn’t have power over me, could they? After all, I knew their agenda, I was on to them.
The entertainment had a hold on me, and was a stronghold in my life that Satan was using to keep me in bondage and blind. I knew a little – but I learned so much more after I finally let it all go! But I’ll get to that part a little later.
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One evening relative of mine came to our house (at the time I was still living with my mother) and was telling us all about how ‘evil’ and ‘bad’ a particular man in town was for disrupting a church service and saying ‘evil’ things about the ‘pastor’. I was sitting at my computer and was positioned in such a way that this relative couldn’t see my computer screen. I listened carefully to what he was saying, very interested in what had happened. I wished I could have seen it. I knew for a fact from personal experience that this ‘pastor’ wasn’t all he was cracked up to be and was glad to hear that there was someone else who saw it – and what’s more – stood up and said something about it.
I casually asked my relative, “What was the guy’s name again?” and he repeated it.
I felt compelled to look the man up online. Now I know that it was the Holy Spirit telling me to look him up. I found two Richard Boyd’s from around the area on Facebook and wasn’t sure which one was him. I finally sent a friend request to the one who’s profile picture was mostly blue, with him wearing a red/burgundy coloured shirt. It turned out that -that- Richard Boyd was the right one…I think it was the Holy Spirit’s guidance telling me which one to send the friend request to, as well.
Anyhow, I was very curious to see what he was saying on Facebook. I spent quite a while “lying low” and just reading his posts. They were like nothing else I was seeing on Facebook. Most of my feed contained either people playing games (at the time I was among them), or ‘fluff’ Christianity…his posts were altogether different. And the Lord was using them greatly to convict me. He was writing notes that were warning people to repent and saying in no uncertain terms that God’s judgement is coming. Most people didn’t (and don’t) like his message…but his message is true, regardless of what people think of it.
Then one night in November, I decided to have a movie marathon. Not the Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings marathons I used to have. No. Instead I watched every single movie about Jesus I had available to me. All together it was around nine hours or so worth of material. I things I had been reading in Richard’s notes and posts stayed on my mind and as a result, God was on my mind more than ever before.
As I watched these dramatizations of the life of Christ and what He did for us, the facts began to sink in to my heart in a new way. The hardness of my heart was melting. I started to weep. I ended up kneeling on the couch and still weeping, asking Jesus to forgive me for my sin, for my foolishness, and I begged Him to save me.
This time was different. I knew it. I wanted Jesus and wanted Him to show me what to do and how to live. I realized He is what really matters in this life. He’s not some side issue. He’s not a hobby. It’s not just about having a religion for something to do…He is the King of Kings and Lord of Lords! He wasn’t just a Jewish carpenter from Nazareth. He is the Alpha and Omega, the Way, the Truth, and the Life, and no one can come to the father but through Him – including me.
A process started after that night. I had so much to learn, and I wanted to learn as fast as I could. The Bible I’d been given for my graduation became more dear to me than it had ever been before and I studied it carefully. I also read every devotional book that was available to me.
I started listening to sermons that I found online by the late David Wilkerson. In time I ended up loading my mp3 player with nothing but sermons and would fall asleep with them playing and wake up with them still in my ears. More and more of my time was devoted to these things and less and less time was going to secular entertainment – but even so, I didn’t give it up totally – God had to give me a strong lesson about that!
Videogames were also starting to have less and less appeal to me. I didn’t quit altogether right away, but the addiction disappeared. My life no longer seemed miserable. It was liveable – because of Jesus. I really didn’t want to stay where I was living, but I settled in my mind and heart that if that was where the Lord wanted me to be – I would be content there. Looking back I feel like it was a lesson in learning to abase before the Lord would let me abound.